Forever Changed
by drtgaf
Summary: Finn gets a few weeks off from the army. He comes home to Rachel and her broken spirit. Rated M for material.
1. The Call

**A/N: I no little to nothing about how the army works so be gentle. Other than that, read and review. Let me know if this is a story you'd like to continue reading.**

_7:00 AM Lima, Ohio_

_Riiiinnnggg, Riinnnggg, Riiinnggg_

Kurt Hummel moaned as the most annoying ring in the world woke him up. He rolled over in his bed and reached for his phone to see what jerk would wake him up at 7 in the morning. He shot up when he saw that it was his brother.

"Finn?" He answered quickly.

_"Hey, Kurt. What ya doing?" _

"Well I was trying to catch up on some beauty sleep, but some soldier from Georgia woke me up. Why did you wake me up?"

_"I just got news that I am getting a few weeks off starting next Sunday. I had some free time and thought you'd like to know. Just don't tell mom or Burt."_

"First, yay! Second, why not?"

_" I just want to surprise her. On another note, do you know if anyone's in town or gonna be?"_

Kurt sighed, knowing Finn would find out eventually. "Well, yeah. There's one."

_"Who?"_

"Rachel."

Finn thought a second before he spoke. _"Is she on break?"_

"No, she's been back for a while."

_"Kurt, what happened?"_

"It's kind of a long story. One that, so far, does not have a happy ending."

_"Kurt, quit being dramatic and just tell me what happened."_

"Well, about three weeks ago, Rachel was walking back to her dorm from a practice room. She was almost back when someone attacked her from behind." Finn's mind started racing. "Finn, he didn't take her money or anything she had on her. He did however… rape her."

_"What the fuck, Kurt? How the hell did that happen? Is she okay? Did someone kill that guy?"_

"She's fine, well physically. She's been in her bedroom for the past three weeks. As for the guy, no one knows who he is. Rachel passed out during the attack and she came to in a hospital. It was so dark that she never saw him."

_"So the jackass is still out there."_

"Yes. That's why Rachel won't go back. That and well, she's just depressed. I've tried everything. She doesn't want to talk to anyone. She's even turned me away more than not."

_"Listen, I gotta go. I'll be home in a little over a week and I'll try to see what I can do. I hate to leave on this note, but I have to. See ya later, bro."_

"Bye, Finn." Kurt sighed as he ended the call. Anytime he thought about what happened to Rachel, it's like he's been emotionally drained. Maybe Finn could help when he got home.


	2. Coming Home

_One Week Later…_

Finn stepped up onto the front porch and took a deep breath. He sat his bag down and knocked on the door. He waited for a moment and then the door opened.

"Listen, whatever you're selling, we… " Burt started before even looking up. Once he saw Finn, he immediately shook Finn's hand and gave him a hug. "Welcome home, son. Come on in."

Finn grabbed his bag and made his way into the house. He dropped his stuff off in the living room and walked into the kitchen, hoping he would find his mom. He did.

She was stirring something on the countertop and humming some Journey song. Finn quietly snuck up behind her. He tapped her on the shoulder causing her to be startled and making her drop the bowl, spilling all of the contents. She could've cared less. She jumped up to hug and kiss her son.

"Finn! What are you doing here?"

"I got a few weeks off. I was going to tell you, but I figured it'd be better if I surprised you."

That night his mom cooked his favorite meal. Kurt had come home and greeted his brother with a big hug which made Finn rethink his brother's strength. Finn told all of them about basic training; mainly the cool and safe parts. He was talking to his mother after all.

Carol and Burt ended up going to bed before Finn and Kurt, of course. The brothers stayed up talking.

"Okay, tell me the truth. Have you gotten hurt or done anything stupid down there?" Kurt asked.

"Thanks for your faith in me." Finn said with a smirk. Kurt raised his eyebrows. Finn knew he had to answer the question or else Kurt would keep bugging him. "Fine. I had one little incident a few weeks ago." Finn lifted up his T-shirt sleeve to reveal a small scar. "One of the guys accidently fired his gun while cleaning it. Idiot. Anyways, it didn't penetrate my skin. It was basically just a burn. Nothing more. No telling mom."

"Don't have to worry about that. I still remember how she reacted when you enlisted."

Finn rubbed his forehead. "Yeah, that was a nightmare."

Finn paused for a moment before speaking again.

"How's Rachel?"

"Same. I went over there yesterday. Her dads are beyond worried about her. She barely does anything other than lay in her bed and cry. She hardly even eats. NYADA is trying to be understanding, but they can only hold her spot for so long."

"Is she talking to anyone?"

"Not really. Quinn went over there when she was on break a few days ago and she said the Rachel talked to her for a while. Don't know what about, but talking about anything is good."

"Yeah. Do you think her dads would let me try?"

"I'm sure that would be fine. They're willing to try anything at this point."

"Alright, I'll go over tomorrow."

"I'd go with you, but I've got class. Yay LCC." Kurt said as he rolled his eyes.

"Such great enthusiasm coming from you." Finn said with a grin.

The brothers made their way to bed after their conversation. Finn turned on the light to his bedroom and looked around. It still looked the same, which was to be expected as he was only gone for six months. He got ready for bed. He almost turned the light off when he saw some old pictures on his dresser. He picked them up and sat on his bed to go through them. They were mainly of him and Rachel. A few with their friends. He sighed looking at her smile in one of the pictures. She was sitting on his lap and he was whispering in her ear. She must have found what he was saying funny because she had a smile a mile wide on her face. She was so beautiful and happy. Finn knew she'd always be beautiful. The happy part is what worried him. He was going to try anything to make sure she was happy again.

He turned off the light, slipped into bed, and drifted off to sleep where he dreamt of Rachel, as always.


	3. The First Cut is the Deepest

**A/N: Thanks for all the favs and reviews, but I need more. In this chapter, Finn and Rachel see each other for the first time since he put her on the train. Let me know how you like it. **

Finn stood there listening to the chimes play to alert the residents that someone was at the door. Being there, on that porch, brought back so many memories. Some bad, but mostly good memories. He heard someone coming so he straightened up a bit.

The door opened revealing Mr. Hiram Berry. "Why, Finn. I had no idea you were home."

"Hi, . I got a few weeks off so I thought I'd head home."

"Glad to see your still alive." Finn wasn't sure whether he meant that statement.

"Listen, Mr. Berry, I heard about what happened and was wondering if maybe I could try talking to her."

Hiram's face fell when he realized what Finn was talking about. "Come on in."

Finn went into the familiar home. He looked around seeing that nothing changed. Hiram led him into the living room where LeRoy was reclining in his chair. He immediately got up and offered his hand to Finn who shook it. Once the three were settled down, Finn decided to cut to the point.

"So is it okay for me to talk to Rachel?"

Hiram answered quickly, "Oh my, I completely forgot that's why you were here. "

"Yeah, Kurt told me what happened and how she's been doing and I was hoping maybe I could help."

"You can try, but not now. She's in the shower. Good luck trying to get her to talk to you. The only person she's talked to was Quinn. She came by a few days ago and she spent over two hours up there with Rachel." LeRoy told him.

"That's what Kurt said."

"Yeah. In all honesty, we think it's men in general she's not talking to which, of course, worries us. She won't even talk to Kurt. It's bad. Really bad." LeRoy said with a long face.

"Yeah, she hasn't even sung since she's been home. Nothing as much as a hum. I guess if I were her, I'd be the same way after something like this. I just… I hate seeing her like this." Hiram said as he started to softly cry.

"I'm so sorry Mr. and Mr. Berry." Finn looked down at his hands.

A few moments of silence passed when all of a sudden they heard a screech from upstairs. Due his basic training, Finn reacted quickly and ran upstairs. He went straight to the bathroom. He opened the door and made his way over to the shower which was still running.

"Rachel, are you okay?" He said before slowly pushing the shower curtain out of the way.

"Finn? What are you doing here?" Rachel replied as she laid at the bottom of the shower.

Finn immediately saw the blood as it came into view. He shut off the shower and grabbed a towel. He held it in front of her. "Come on. Get up."

Rachel did as she was told. "What are you doing here?"

Finn wrapped the towel around Rachel. As he did, he noticed how skinny she had gotten. He lifted her up out of the shower.

"Finn! What the hell?" She was surprised by him picking her up, but also by the strength he had.

He gently sat her on the countertop. By that time both of her fathers were up there.

"Rachel, sweetheart, are you okay?" Hiram asked.

Her gaze was still fixed on her ex- fiancée as he searched the cabinets for something. "What are you doing here? Finn? Answer me." She was beyond annoyed by his silence.

"This might sting." Was all he said as he poured a little hydrogen peroxide on her leg.

Rachel moaned/silently scream as the stuff started doing it's job. Her fathers saw that Finn had it under control and decided to leave the two.

Once the pain of the sting faded, Rachel returned to her original question. "What are you doing here?"

He knew he had to answer because he could feel her gaze and it wasn't pleasant.

"I got a few weeks off and came home." He answered as he cleaned her cut. "What happened? To your leg I mean?"

"I was shaving my leg and I slipped. Why are you here?"

"I came to see you."

"Kurt told you didn't he." She said looking like she was about to cry.

"Yeah, he did." Finn found the Band-Aids and smiled.

"What?" Rachel asked.

"Only you would have Band-Aids with little gold stars on them." He said with a smirk. She just shook her head.

He put the Band-Aid on her cut and then cleaned up his make shift first aid station. "I'll let you get dressed." He then left Rachel in her bathroom wondering what the hell had just happened.

As Rachel was getting dressed, Finn made his way downstairs to tell her dads what had happened. When she was ready, she quietly made her way downstairs. She entered the living room timidly, not sure if she were dreaming or not.

"Rachel, sweetie, are you okay?" LeRoy asked.

She nodded.

Finn got up and made his way over to her. As he approached her, she backed up, not letting him reach her. He soon stopped knowing he wasn't getting any closer. "Mr. and Mr. Berry, would you mind if Rachel and I went up to her room and talked for a bit." The fathers gave their blessing hoping Finn could help.

Finn headed toward Rachel's room, but Rachel stayed in place.

"Rachel, come on. I just want to talk." Finn said holding out his hand.

She looked at his hand. She rejected the gesture and passed Finn making her way to her room.

Finn sighed silently hoping the situation wasn't hopeless.


	4. The Talk

**A/N: So this was a hard chapter to write. I wasn't quite sure about how to write it. Let me know what you think. Please R & R.**

Finn walked into Rachel's room and saw Rachel sitting on the edge of her bed. She looked like a child waiting for punishment. He came in the room and closed the door.

"Hey." Was all he said.

She looked at him with those big brown eyes that made him melt. That was all she did. Looked at him.

"Listen, I just want to talk. We can talk about anything." She just stared at him. "Rachel, just say something."

She looked away. Her eyes landed on her dresser which was like a shrine to their relationship. Even the picture of Barbra the Pig was pinned on her mirror. He smiled when he saw the pig. He remembered her reaction when he gave it to her. He was lost in thought when she spoke.

"Why are you here?"

He sighed. "I told you. I got a few weeks off and I came home."

"No. Why are you here, at my house?"

"I came to talk to you."

"What do you want me to say? Do want me to tell you what happened? Do you want me to tell you how I'm still hurting because of what you did? What? What do you want me to say?" She said on the brink of tears.

He took a breath, not knowing how to answer her.

"Why don't you just leave? I shouldn't have to tell you how. You've mastered that." She said as she laid down on her bed and rolled on her side so he couldn't see her.

He stood there trying to think of what to do. He knew he wasn't going to leave. "No. I'm not leaving."

She didn't answer. Just laid on her bed. He walked around to the other side of the bed and looked at her. She rolled onto her other side, annoyed. He walked back to the other side and sat down in a chair next to her bed.

He thought before he said anything. "I've got a proposition for you." She looked up, interested in what he was going to say. "You tell me exactly what happened that night and I'll leave and if you really want me to, I'll never come back."

"Just get out." She whispered.

"Tell me what happened and I will." He said with a stern face.

She thought about it for a few minutes. He wasn't going to leave. She knew that. She couldn't physically kick him out. That was for sure. She also knew that she didn't want to tell him what happened. The only person who knew the full story was the police officer who took her statement. Rachel was also humiliated by that moment and didn't want Finn to know that. When it came down to what she decided, she went with telling him and getting him out of there.

"I was walking back from practicing a song. He attacked and raped me. I passed out and woke up in the hospital. There, satisfied." She said quickly.

"No. I said, 'Tell me exactly what happened.' Go through it moment by moment."

"That's impossible. And mean, Finn. How could you expect me to tell you that?"

"Rach, I love you and I know you probably don't want to hear that right now, but I do. And because I love you, I want you to tell me exactly what happened. Holding it in is not good. Let me share some of the pain." Finn said grabbing her hand and giving it a gentle squeeze.

She pulled her hand back. "I'm going to roll over and tell you what happened. Stay where you are. I don't want to see you when I tell you." He nodded and then she flipped back over.

She took a deep breath trying to calm her nerves. She used to be able to get up in front of hundreds of people and sing. Now she could barely speak to one of the people she loved.

"I was practicing for an upcoming audition. I really wanted it. I knew it was a long shot because I'm a freshman, but that didn't mean I wasn't going to try. I packed my stuff up into my new Wicked bag and left the building. It was about 9 o'clock at that point. At NYADA, that's not late at all. I had a bunch of homework to do so I needed to get back quick. I turned on my iPod and put the ear buds in and started walking. I should have gone through main campus, but I needed to get back quick. Instead, I went to the sidewalk along a quite little street. In the day time, the street looked better. There would be children playing and people walking their dogs. At night, it looked different. I ignored the difference and started to walk back to my dorm. I did however reach in my bag and pull out my pepper spray, just in case.

"With the volume of the music coming from my iPod, I didn't hear him walk up behind me. One moment, I was walking humming along with a song and the next, I'm slammed up against a wall in an alley. Somewhere in the middle of it, I dropped my pepper spray. I tried to scream. He placed his hand over my mouth. Then he ripped my ear buds out of my ears and threw my iPod and bag on the ground. I heard a click and looked down."

Rachel paused and took a deep, shaky breath. "He had a gun. He poked the gun into my side and said, 'You try anything and I will kill you.' I didn't know what to do. I just stood there shaking as some stranger held me up against a wall. He put the gun back in his pocket and then threw me to the ground. It hurt. I let out a scream. He pulled the gun back out and pointed it at my head. I thought he was going to shoot me, but he slowly put the gun back. He then crouched down over me and whispered in my ear, 'You know you asked for it.' I tried to think of anything else at that point. I thought about glee and my parents, even Shelby. He gripped my skirt and pulled it down." Rachel paused, thinking and angry.

"He then ripped off my underwear. At that point, I thought, this is over. There's nothing I can do. Then I thought of you. I thought of what you would do if you were there. I couldn't take it anymore. I kneed him, hard. He backed off just enough so that I could get up. I started to grab my things and then he grabbed my ankle. He pulled it and I fell. He hovered over me again. I kicked and punched and resisted in every way I could. I'm pretty sure I even broke his nose. Then he grabbed his gun. Instead of shooting me, he hit me over the head. The world was spinning. At the time, I had no idea what was going on. I just knew he was raping me."

Rachel paused after the words left her mouth. She didn't want to talk about it anymore. She wanted it to end. "I passed out and woke up in the hospital." She stopped talking, hoping Finn would understand that that was the end.

Finn didn't know what to do. His fists were clinched. He felt a tear roll down his face. He looked at Rachel, lying on her bed. Her back shook every once in a while. He could tell that she was trying to hold it together.

She startled him when she spoke again. "Can you leave now?" She asked.

He stood up and started to leave. Before he did, he turned back around and said, "I'll be back tomorrow."

He waited to see if she said anything. After a moment of silence, he decided to leave. Once he shut her door behind him, he put his ear up to the door and listened. Sure enough, he could hear her sobbing her heart out. It was all he could do not to go back in and hold her.


	5. Vegan Soup

**A/N: Hey all. This is kind of a filler chapter. I know where I want the story to go. I'm just trying to figure out how to get it there. Please R & R.**

Finn went home and tried to process what Rachel had told him. He knew how much courage it took for her to actually tell him what happened. He hated hearing what happened, but he knew that she needed to get it out. If she never talked about it, she would be avoiding it. She wouldn't be able to move on. Now he had to figure out what to say to her. He didn't want to act any different around her because that wouldn't help. He laid down in his bed and tried to think of what he was going to do the next day.

**-X-**

Rachel sat up and grabbed some tissues from her night stand. She was shaking. Telling Finn was the hardest part of everything that had happened. Part of her was mad that he made her tell him. The other part of her was kind of glad. She could be open with him. He listened to her and didn't interrupt her. She laid back down on her bed and drifted off to sleep, wondering if he was really going to show up the next day.

**-X-**

True to his word, Finn showed up the next day. He rang the doorbell and LeRoy answered it.

"Oh! Hi, Finn. This is starting to feel like old times. What can I do you for?" LeRoy asked as he let Finn in.

"I thought maybe I could hang out with Rachel today. I'd like to try to get her out of that bedroom." Finn said.

"Sounds great. Well, listen, Hiram is at work. Now, I've taken off these past few weeks to stay with Rachel, but I do kind of need to go in. It would be great if you could stay, at least, until I got back."

"Sure. That'll be fine."

"Now, Finn, I'm trusting you with my girl and you better treat her right. I normally wouldn't be like this, but…" He trailed off. "Just take care of her and call me if you need me."

"Yes, sir."

Finn helped LeRoy out of the door while receiving a few more warnings. Once Mr. Berry left, Finn made his way up to Rachel's room. He knocked, but didn't hear an answer. He walked in and saw her lying in her bed. She was awake. She looked over at him. He took that as a sign to come in.

"Hey." He said walking over to the side of her bed. He lifted up a tubberware container. "My mom made you some vegan soup. She found some sort of recipe online. I tried it. It's pretty good."

She gave a small smile and sat up. She took the soup.

"Uh, I'll go get you a spoon. Do you want some water, too?" He asked headed towards the door.

"Yeah, could you grab the cup with the gold start on it, please?" She said smelling the soup.

"Sure." He said.

He was back within a matter of minutes with a spoon and her cup of ice water. He handed her the spoon and grabbed the chair and pulled it up to the bedside. He placed the water on her bedside table.

"So, what do you want to do today? I was thinking we could take a drive. Maybe go to the high school and see Mr. Shue or maybe the park. What do you think?"

"I don't know. I was just going to stay here. I'm kind of tired." She said sipping her soup.

"Come on, Rach. Let's get out of the house. A little sun 'll do you good." He said with a smile.

"I know. I just.." She looked at her soup. "I just don't want to really go anywhere."

"Ok." He thought some more. "How bout we have a movie day. We can go downstairs and watch some movies. Pop some popcorn and just relax."

"Ok."

Once she finished her soup they went downstairs to the family room. Finn loved watching TV on the Berry's TV. It was huge and they had a great sound system.

"What do you want to watch? We can watch anything, even _Funny Girl_." He said sincerely.

"Um.. How about Titanic? I haven't seen that one in a while."

"Alright." Finn said grabbing the disc from their collection. He let everything warm-up while he went and made popcorn. He came back and placed the bowl beside Rachel who had settled onto one side of the couch. He sat down on the other side of the bowl and hit PLAY on the remote. They sat and watched the movie while eating their popcorn.

Every once in a while, their hands would touch. Finn thought Rachel might flinch or something, but she was so engrossed in the movie that she didn't seem to notice.

About halfway through the movie, they took a break. Mainly, because Finn had to go to the bathroom. Rachel stood up and stretched. She cleaned up the empty popcorn bowl. When she came back, she laid down on the couch with her head propped up on a pillow.

Finn came back and saw her lying there. He went on the other side of the couch, lifted her feet, sat down, and placed her feet in his lap. He started the movie back up. The giant ship was starting to crack. He remembered that Rachel hated this part so he started rubbing her feet.

The movie was almost over. Rose had just discovered Jack was frozen. Finn's attention was drawn to Rachel who had started crying. Out of the blue, Rachel sat up and switched sides of the couch to where she was now leaning on Finn. He wrapped his arms around her and let her cry. The credits soon started playing, but Rachel was still crying. Finn didn't know if she were crying because Jack died or not. He just held her.

She soon calmed down and stopped crying. She ended up falling asleep in his arms. He carried her up to her room and placed her in her bed and took a seat beside the bed. He stayed there until her dad came home. He told LeRoy to tell her that he'd come by the next day.

He left the house feeling better than he did the previous day. Sure she had cried and they really didn't go anywhere, but she let him hold her. That was something. She was the one who leaned on him and let him hold her. That was huge. Finn felt a little glimmer of hope. Maybe he was helping.


	6. Self Defense

**A/N: So this chapter was inspired by an episode of One Tree Hill. Please R & R.**

A week passed and they had done pretty much the exact same thing every day. As much as Finn loved spending time with Rachel, he knew she wasn't healing as much as he would like. She was talking more and more to him and she was eating better, but that was pretty much it. Her dads hadn't heard a peep from her and she still hadn't even hummed a note.

Finn laid in his bed wondering what he could do. He had only a few weeks here and he wanted to make sure that she was okay before he had to go back. He rolled onto his side and spied a dark blue bag in the corner of his room. Then he got an idea. Satisfied, he drifted off to sleep where his dreams were full of Rachel, of course.

**-X-**

Finn showed up on her front porch just like clockwork, wearing a hoodie and sweats, carrying his dark blue bag. Her fathers greeted him and he went up to her room where he knocked, as always.

She opened the door and allowed him in.

"Hey." He said.

"Hey. What's with the bag?"

"Well, I have an idea for something we can do today. I know you really don't want to go out, but I think that this could be helpful and fun."

"Helpful? How so?" She asked.

"Well, I thought we could go to the Lima Boxing Club." He let the idea hang for a moment.

"Why would we do that?" She asked, confused.

"Well, it's a great stress reliever and it's fun."

"Finn, you know I don't condone violence." She said trying to get out of it.

"I know. It's not like you're gonna hurt anyone. We can use the punching bags and maybe spar a bit." She stilled looked unsure. "Listen, Rach. I just thought this would be a good idea. You might feel safer knowing that you could knock someone out like that." He snapped his fingers to emphasize his point.

"I don't know."

"How about we go and if you totally hate it, we can go do something else?" He said.

He eventually got her to agree and they got in his car and drove over to the boxing club. When they entered the parking lot, Rachel looked around. She saw a few people entering and leaving. So far, they all looked pretty rough.

Finn saw the look on her face. "Hey, don't worry about them. I'm here. Nothing's going to happen. If anyone makes you feel unsafe, just tell me and I'll do something about it okay?"

The look on his face is what convinced her that he was telling the truth. She calmed down and they went in.

The place reeked of sweat and balls. Finn grabbed her hand and guided her over to the punching bags. He put his bag down and grabbed two pairs of gloves. He handed her the smaller pair and helped her put them on and then put on his own.

"Okay. Now what?"

"Well you just punch it." Finn stated.

"Uh. Okay." Rachel weakly pushed the bag with her glove.

"No. More like this." She watched as Finn crouched down a bit and started swinging at the bag_. Left, Right, Left. Left, Left, Right_. His faced seemed so concentrated and determined.

After a few more punches later, he stopped and shook it off. "Alright, your turn."

"I didn't know you had so much anger in you." She said staring in disbelief.

"Well, I just try to think about bad things. People who have done me wrong. Horrible days. Whatever. Come on, now. Try it." He said patting the bag as though it were a friend.

Rachel tried to take the same stance as Finn had and started to throw a few punches. At first, they were weak, but then her strength seemed to grow and grow. Her thoughts were racing, thinking of all the bad things that happened to her:

Finding out about Shelby and Shelby turning her down

Jesse and the egg debacle

Losing Regionals the first time

Finding out Finn lied

Finn breaking up with her

Getting drunk and being puked on

Quinn slapping her

Coming in 12th at Nationals the first time

Being suspended

Quinn's accident

Finn sending her off a train

And finally, the attack

Once her thoughts came of the attack came to Rachel, she was beating the crap out of that bag. She was hitting it as hard as she possibly could. She punched that bag for what seemed like an hour.

She had to stop eventually due to fatigue. She dropped to the floor, panting. Finn looked down at her and saw a tear roll down her cheek. He wasn't sure what to do. He hadn't meant for this to upset her.

A few minutes of silence passed and Rachel got up. She looked up at him. "Can I do that again?" She asked.

Finn smiled and said, "Absolutely. You did great."

They stayed at the boxing club for most of the day punching the bag. They eventually moved onto sparing which was more like Rachel hitting pads on Finn's hands.

He took her home and left so she could shower and rest. He went home and laid in his bed thinking. He was counting this day as a step in the right direction.


	7. A Day in the Park

**A/N: Hey all! Here's an interesting update. Please R&R. Also, I have another story out called To The Moon and Back. So go check it out. TTFN!**

A few weeks passed and Finn knew that his time at home was running out. Before he left, there were two things he needed to do: get Rachel back to New York and define their relationship.

Today, he figured he would try to work on the latter.

He arrived at her house, as usual. She opened the door for him. She started doing this last week. He made his way into her house as she explained that her dad was at work and her daddy was on the computer, working from home.

"Well, how about we go to the park or something?" Finn suggested. Rachel was still very timid in public, but she was getting better. She was now able to go into restaurants as long as they had plenty of light. He even got her to go with him to the shop. He didn't think she would because of all the men that worked there.

"Um… Okay, I guess."

"Alright, well wanna make some sandwiches. Maybe we could have a picnic."

"Sure."

They made their sandwiches, grabbed some drinks and made their way to Lima Park. Finn grabbed the picnic basket out of the trunk, grabbed Rachel's hand and went into the park. If anyone passing by looked at them, they would have thought the two were on a date.

Rachel picked out a shady spot near a tree. They laid out the picnic blanket, settled down and started to eat. They shared some small talk. Most of their conversation was full of nonsense. After all, they saw each other everyday. There wasn't much to share. They were almost done with the main course when Finn decided that it was time for an important discussion.

"Rach, I got something important I need to talk to you about."

"That doesn't sound good."

Finn let out a small smile. "I was just wondering what we are. You know, like are we friends or more than that." He said nervously.

Rachel sighed. She really didn't want to have this conversation. She knew it was coming, but she had hoped it wouldn't come so soon.

"I… I don't know."

"Listen, Rach, I love you…. I always will. I know I hurt you, but I didn't want to hold you back. Rachel, you've got so much talent and it would be have been selfish of me to not let you show the world your talent. I just… I don't know. I want to be in a relationship with you. I just don't want to hold you back." He finished looking at the ground.

Rachel was quiet for a while. Finn felt even more nervous as she thought.

"Finn, I thought we were going to get married. It hurt me when that didn't happen. I never doubted that I'd make it to New York somehow, but I wanted to make it there with you. It's just not the same if you're not there. And I know that's selfish of me because I'm not taking your dreams into account. Honestly, though, I would give anything to be with you again. I'd give it all up. Heck, I already have. I love you, Finn. That's never going to change. I just want to make sure that if we start up again, that we have the same idea of where we're going and how we're going to get there." She said.

"So where does this put us?" He asked unsure of what to do.

Rachel thought for a moment before she did anything. Then, she leaned in and gently pressed her lips to his. He was taken by surprise, but didn't pull away. She leaned back breaking the kiss. She smiled. It wasn't a small smile. No, this was her hundred watt smile. He had missed it so much. The smile was contagious so he smiled back at her.

"I'm still not sure what this means." He said honestly.

She put her forehead against his and said, "It means that we should try. We owe to ourselves to do this. We love each other. Our love is too big to throw away." She said as her eyes shifted between his eyes and his lips.

"Dating?" He asked.

She nodded and leaned in for another kiss.

After a few more light kisses, they packed up and made their way back to his car. Finn saw their conversation as an accomplishment. He thought that maybe he could try to approach to other conversation.

He shut the trunk and walked Rachel over to her side of the car. He grabbed her hand and stopped before opening the door. "Rachel, there's something else we need to talk about." He looked into her eyes knowing that he had her full attention. "You need to go back to New York." She looked confused.

"What?" She asked as she looked to the ground.

"Rach, you need to go back. New York. It's where your dream is. Broadway. If you don't go back soon, you never will."

"You want me to leave." She asked shaking her head. She couldn't believe this was happening again. He was sending her off to New York.

"No. If you go back, I'll go with you. At least until I have to go back to the army."

"I don't know if I can."

"I know. But Rach, you don't have to do it alone this time." He said as he pulled her into a hug. She hugged him back which made him think that this was going well. He leaned back and looked into her eyes. "Will you go back?"

"I don't know. What about him?" She asked as tears gathered in her eyes.

"Well, I'll be there for the first little while. Maybe I can help find him or something. And if that doesn't work we'll get you a bodyguard." He said with a smile trying to lighten the mood. She gave her now familiar small smile as she leaned back into the hug. She felt safe in his arms.

The rest of their day consisted of talking about New York and trying to figure out the logistics of when and how to get there. Rachel was silently excited about Finn coming with her, but still nervous about the possibility of seeing the man who attacked her again. The police had promised to call when they caught him and they have yet to call.

Finn was glad that Rachel had agreed to go and let him go with her. It seemed as though everything was falling into place.


	8. The Trip

**A/N: So this is mostly just a filler chapter. Kinda needed a Segway to get them to NYC. Please R&R. **

"Okay, so if we leave next Friday, we'll have three weeks until I have to leave." Finn said as he settled back onto Rachel's bed watching her write things down. She was a planner if nothing else.

"That sounds good, but do you really have to leave?" She said pouting at him. As the days went by, it seemed as though she was becoming more and more like the old Rachel. The one that fought for solos in glee club or who stood up for someone when they were slushied only to be splashed herself. She seemed happy.

He hated to say it, but, "Yeah, I'll have to go. I don't think the army would be too happy if I said that I wasn't."

She sighed and then laid down next to him. He pulled her into his side and rubbed her shoulder. He didn't want to leave, but he had to.

They had three days to pack before they left for New York. Three days to say goodbye. His mom was disappointed that she wouldn't be able to spend the extra three weeks with him, but she understood. Her dads were worried about her returning to New York, but tried not to show it, knowing she needed to go.

Rachel questioned going back countless times, but Finn always convinced her that it was for the best.

**-X-**

It was the Thursday before they left that he got the idea. They were all packed and ready to leave. They still had time to do one more thing.

"Hey Rach. I have an idea of something we should do today." He said as he watched her straighten up her room. Packing was always messy.

"And what might that be?"

"Well, I was thinking we could maybe do something like the boxing thing."

She gave him a questioning look. "What?"

"Well, I thought it might be a good idea for you to take a shooting class and then maybe get a small gun. You know something, you could carry around when your in New York." Her face went pale. "Rach?"

"No. Nope. Sorry, not shooting a gun. I will take all the self defense classes you want me to, but I will NOT shoot a gun. They are dangerous and life-threatening." She said.

"Okay, okay. It was just a suggestion." He got up and walked over to her. "I just want you to be protected when I leave."

She hugged him. "I know. Just… no guns."

"Okay. No guns. I do like the self defense class idea." He said placing a kiss on her head.

**-X-**

Friday came faster than expected. Rachel and Finn said their last goodbyes and boarded the train to New York. Rachel couldn't help, but feel a sense of déjà vu. The difference was that Finn was coming with her.

He grabbed her hand and gave it a squeeze as they boarded the train. They took their seats and got settled in for a long ride. It wasn't long before Rachel fell asleep against Finn. He held her and kissed the top of her head. He stayed awake the entire time.

When they pulled into their stop, he woke her up. They grabbed their things and exited the train.

They went outside and hailed a cab which took them to a hotel where they planned to stay for a while.

Once settled, Finn said, "Hey Rach, we should probably get some dinner."

"Yeah." She said softly. She had been kind of quiet since they arrived in New York.

"Rach, you okay?" He asked concern.

"Yeah."

"You sure about that?"

"No." She shrugged and went to sit on the bed. "I just.. I don't know. It just feels weird being here, you know? Back in New York."

"What about the whole fall in love every minute New York?"

"It's gone." She said with a small smile.

"Maybe we can fix that." He said sitting beside her and embracing her in a hug.

"I love you, Finn." She said. He smiled.

"I love you, too."


	9. To-Do Lists

**A/N: Sorry for the long wait. Stupid school. Here's another chapter. Let me know what you think. Don't forget to check out my other stories. Some get updated more often than others. Please R&R! Lots of Love and a Happy New Year!**

Rachel woke up the next morning to the sound of typing. She turned over in the bed and saw Finn typing on his old laptop. He noticed that she was awake.

"Hey, sleepy head." He said leaning down to kiss her head.

"Hey." She said rubbing the sleep from her eyes. "What time is it?"

He looked at the computer screen. "9:54." He said.

"Really?" He nodded. "Wow. That is late." She stretched her arms up. "So, what ya working on?" She asked.

"Well, I decided to make a list of things we need to do."

"So I guess I 'm rubbing off on you a bit, huh?"

He smiled. "Yeah, yeah, yeah. Anyways, I just thought that it'd be a good idea to make a list, get it all done and then spend some time together. At least, while I'm still here."

"Okay, well, let's here it. What's on the list?" She asked.

"Well, I thought that we could begin by checking in at the police station and see if they've found anything. Then, I thought we might go by NYADA and just walk around for a bit." He stopped. "That's all I got on the list for today." He explained.

"Oh, okay. Sounds fine by me." She said with a nod.

"Oh and I have one very important question to ask." She nodded for him to go on. "Well, I was wondering if you wanted to stay on campus or find an apartment. I mean, which would you be more comfortable with?" He asked.

She thought for a moment. "I'm not really sure. Although, I do think that there is more security on campus than there would be at a normal apartment building."

"True. I just want to make sure that you feel safe."

"Well, Finn, the problem happened off-campus. Kind of. If I had gone through campus like I usually do, it probably wouldn't have happened."

"Okay, that's fine." He said. "So, want to go ahead and get ready. We can catch an early lunch and then head over to the station."

"Okay." She said getting out of bed.

**-X-**

They had lunch at a little bistro that she used to love to go to. Afterwards, they walked the short distance to the police station that she had been taken to shortly after she was released from the hospital.

She kept getting this eerie feeling as they walked through the streets. Every time that she felt it creep up, she just clung onto Finn's arm and all her worries seemed to disappear. Rachel started to question if she were going to be able to survive the city after Finn leaves.

They arrived at the station around noon. Finn grabbed Rachel's hand as they entered the building. The last time she had been there, she was shaken and in shock. She barely remembered what happened in that building.

They approached the front desk.

"Yes, how may I help you?" The man at the desk asked.

"Um, this is Rachel Berry." Finn gestured to her. "We were wanting to check on how her case was going." He knew that the words came out a little weird, but hoped that the guy understood what he was saying.

"Wait. You're the Berry girl?" Rachel nodded. "Hi. I'm Detective Reed. I was the one who talked with you after the, uh, incident."

Rachel looked closer. "Oh, yeah. Sorry, I didn't recognize you. That day was kind of a blur." She explained.

"That's fine." He said with a smile. "Oh, so you're case. Right. Um, how about you both come with me?"

They followed him to what seemed like his office. "Have a seat."

They sat across from him. Rachel reached for Finn's hand again. He grabbed it and gave it an encouraging squeeze.

"Okay, so I'm just going to cut to the chase. We do have a lead." At this Rachel and Finn both sat up. "After looking through rape cases that occurred over the past few months, it seems that there is a pattern with about five of them, including yours. They all occurred near college campuses, all were freshmen girls, and they all claimed that the guy had a gun. They were also evenly spaced in time. It seems like the guy waited on us to stop snooping before he did it again.

"We do have a few suspects in mind, but we really need more information. According to the other files, the girls were either in a dark area and could not see his face or were knocked out and couldn't remember what he looked like. Your statement seemed to be the most detailed of the five." He paused. "I'm glad that you came by. I was hoping that maybe you remembered some more or had something else to add."

Rachel thought for a moment. This information was good news and, yet, sad. How could someone want to hurt five innocent freshmen girls?

"Well, I'm sorry, but I haven't remembered anything else." She felt bad that she couldn't help.

"That's alright Miss Berry. I would appreciate it if you would look at something though." He reached in his desk and pulled out a piece of paper. "One of the other girls gave us a rough idea of what the guy looked like. She had been able to feel of his face and told us what she remembered about it. I'm hoping that you might be able to tell me if he looks familiar and maybe add some to it. Our sketch artist had a rough time, but this is what we have." He slid the piece of paper over to her.

Rachel took a deep breath before looking down at the drawing. Finn gave her hand another encouraging squeeze. She glanced down at the drawing. She noticed his facial hair first. From what little she remembered, the guy that attacked her had a short beard and no mustache. This guy was the same. She looked at his nose. It looked like she thought it might. She did remember breaking his nose. She wondered if that would have changed his appearance. Then she looked at the eyes. She figured that those would be the least detailed. She stared at the eyes for a moment. Then she remembered something.

"His eyes. They were green. That streetlight from across the street. It lit them up when he would look at me." Detective Reed took note of what she was saying. "He also seemed to have a bit of a twitch. Every once in a while, his right eye would twitch. At first I thought that he was winking, but I don't think he was."

"This is good. This is good. Do you remember anything else, Miss Berry?" He asked.

"Not really. I think he might have had a bit of a uni-brow, but I'm sure about that. Also, I think I broke his nose. I don't know if that would change anything or not. I'm not even sure if I told you that the first time." She said.

Finn sat there amazed. He was so proud of her for remembering. It's not like she could really control that, but still.

The detective took down the notes that he'd received from Rachel. She gave him the information on where she and Finn were staying and they left the police station.

"Well, I think that was a productive outing." He said reaching for her hand. She gave it to him. He noticed that she was shaking. "Rach, are you okay?" He asked concerned.

"I-I don't know. I think so. I feel like I'm remembering more and more from that night. I don't really want to, though." She confessed.

"I'm sorry, Rach. But, if you remember, the police might have a better chance of catching the asshole and locking him up before he hurts somebody else."

She hadn't thought about that. She was one of five girls. There might be more. There could be more in the future. Finn was right. She felt as though she had a new responsibility. She had to help catch this guy before he did any more harm.


	10. What Happened?

**A/N: Sorry for the long wait. I've got other stories that I've been working on and this one is particularly hard to write because of the material. I hope you all enjoy this one. I know that there are a bunch of grammar mistakes in the sentences in the second part, but just go with it. Other than that, please R&R! 3**

The next few days were simply amazing. Finn thought that even though they had a lot to do, they should take a break and try to enjoy the city. He knew that she was a bit afraid of the city after what had happened and he needed to change that.

He set up picnic in Central Park one afternoon. Finn brought her to the picnic area and surprised her. He even had the airplane cups. She was thrilled. It was just what she needed.

"So, how are you feeling?" Finn asked. He had been asking that more often these days.

"Better. Much better." She said with a smile.

"Are you falling in love with the city again?" He asked.

She thought for a moment. "Yeah." She replied. "With the city and with you."

He smiled back and bent down to place a gentle kiss on her lips. They then went back to their lovely lunch.

"Um." Rachel spoke up. "I got an email from NYADA yesterday."

Finn looked up. "What about?"

"Well, the head of the theater department heard that I was going to try out for the last musical and he just wanted to give me the opportunity to try out for the next one."

"Really?" Finn asked. "I wonder why he did that."

"I don't know. I guess that he heard what happened and felt bad about it." She paused. "Actually, I probably shouldn't do it. I don't want an audition out of pity."

Finn grabbed her hand. "No, Rach. You should do it. Even if it is out of pity, they will love you and it could be the start to your career."

Rachel looked up at him. He noticed something right away. That spark. He saw it. It was back in her eyes. He hadn't seen it in so long, he'd forgot that there ever was one. He had to kissed her right then and there.

**-X-**

Every since the meeting with the detective, Rachel has been having nightmares. Most of which, Finn can calm her down from, but some were just too terrible that she would not be able to go back to sleep.

This was one of those nights. After much reluctance, Rachel finally convinced Finn to go on back to sleep. She told him that she would just do some reading or something to try and get her mind off of it.

She took her book and walked over to the chair in the corner of the room and turned on the lamp. She opened the book and looked at the page.

A few minutes passed and she realized that she was just reading the same sentence over and over. She decided to just let her mind wonder. So she sat back in the chair and closed her eyes.

She started to think about everything that had happened. Then she thought about what the detective had said. She couldn't believe that there were four other girls. She wondered how they were dealing with this. She figured that some were probably moving on with there lives, but maybe just one of them were in some sort of institution because they just couldn't deal with it.

She sighed. She didn't want to end up like that. Rachel wanted to be normal again. She didn't want to feel scared. There was only one way that that would happen. The guy had to be in prison. She was sure of that.

But how? The detectives were working on it, but there's only so much that they can do with the information they've got. Then she thought of how much she knew. Not much.

She decided to run through what had happened again in her head. She walked herself through it.

Rachel was walking on the street. She had her iPod in. What was she listening to?

It was something catchy. Oh, she remembered, it was "Call Me Maybe."

She had just bought it. For some reason, it made her think of Finn. She was walking along with the beat, thinking of Finn. She was relatively happy at that point.

Then she felt it. Someone push her into the alley nearby. At first, Rachel had thought there must have been some sort of mistake. Maybe they thought that she was someone else. Someone bad or evil.

She heard a the person's heavy breathing. When they didn't get up, she knew something was most definitely up. But what? What happened next?

Rachel freaked out. That's what happened. She screamed. Or tried to. He covered her mouth harshly. She was taken by surprise. She dropped the pepper spray that she had retrieved from her bag a few streets back. That was her only defense. Now what?

He started grabbing at her things. "Call Me Maybe" ended abruptly. She was unable to hold onto her bag. Rachel paused for a moment in her thoughts. What did she see while this was happening?

He had a T-shirt on. A black one. She tries to focus on his arm. There was some writing on it. Two words. One looked like angel. That was odd. Can't be right.

She focused her thoughts back on what the guy was doing. He was reaching behind him and grabbed something. A gun. She heard a click. She remembered that she felt like she was truly helpless at that point. She shuddered at the thought.

He then spoke to her. His voice. It was scratchy. His breath smelt of smoke. He must be a smoker. His voice was low. It struck pure fear into her. She tried to move onto the next thing quickly.

She was thrown to the ground. It hurt. He was strong. Very strong. In fact, he was built. Very muscular. She remembered looking up at him as he stood over her. He was tall. Not as tall as Finn. More like Mr. Schue's height. She still couldn't see his face.

The fall hurt. She screamed. He didn't like that. He pulled the gun back out. He seemed afraid that her scream would alert someone of what was going on.

He then dropped down on top of her. He hovered over her for a minute. He spoke again. His words hurt. She felt tears finally fall down her face. His hands roamed over her clothes. That was until he reached her skirt. He gripped it and pulled. She felt the fabric ripped as it left her body. The article was thrown to the side.

She looked straight at his face then. He was sweaty. He was tired. That was when she saw his eyes. Shining green. Then his right eye twitch. A beat passed and then her underwear joined her skirt.

That was when it hit her what was happening. Like truly hit her in the gut. So she fought. She punch at his face. She kicked at his legs. He was aggravated. He started squirming to try and stop her. Then she got her shot in. A knee right to the groin. He seemed to shrivel up as he grabbed himself to stop the pain. He was distracted.

She bolted. This was her chance. She felt a surge of adrenaline rush through her. Then it ended. He grabbed her, causing her to fall. She continued her fight against what might happen. She punched him in the nose causing him to recoil, but not give up.

He reached behind him and grabbed that gun. He was no longer aggravated. He was pissed. He hit her over the head with the butt of the gun. She was dazed. She felt as though she was watching this happen to her, but couldn't stop it. In fact, she could no longer feel anything. Her body was numb. So she did the only thing left she could. She screamed at the top of her lungs.

She screamed.

And screamed.

"Rachel!" She heard.

It was Finn.

"Rachel!" He yelled again.

She slowly felt her body start shaking. No. Someone was shaking her.

"Rachel! Wake up!"

She opened her eyes. She was in the bed. Finn was standing over her, staring at her.

He pulled her into his arms. She stayed there shaking. The dream. It was so real. It felt like what had actually happened.

Maybe that's because it was.


	11. I Want To Hold Your Hand

**A/N: Here's another chapter. It's been a while but this is a hard one to write. I know that the end is in sight. So enjoy. Please R&R! Lots of Love**

The next day, Rachel and Finn made their way to the police station to find Detective Reed. Rachel wanted to tell him what she had remembered. It wasn't much, but maybe it would help.

The detective seemed happy with the new information and got right back to work. With the police working on the case, the couple really did not have much else to do so they just walked around the city enjoying the beautiful day.

"Can we go to NYADA?" Rachel randomly asked as she was sipping her smoothie.

Finn was taken aback by the request. "Y-yeah, sure. Mind if I ask why?"

"Well, I figure that I need to go back to help me get used to it again."

Finn smiled. It was the first time that she had mentioned the future. "Alright then." He replied as he wrapped his arm around her shoulders as they continued their walk.

**-X-**

When they arrived at NYADA, Rachel immediately grabbed Finn's hand. He thought that maybe she was scared and didn't want to go any further. Instead, she excitedly pulled him towards a building. He gladly followed her.

"This is one of the music buildings. It's mainly for vocal performance." She informed him as they walked through the front door.

He followed her as she took him through the building, showing him the practice rooms and recital halls. They even stopped in one of the practice rooms so she could sing him a song. They left that room and walked down the hall to another. In that one, she tried to get him to do some vocal exercises with the piano, but he shortly changed her mind and they ended up making out instead.

She then took him to the cafeteria where he insisted on buying them lunch, mostly because he was hungry and they had a burrito place. As they were sitting in the cafeteria, he noticed a few people staring. He figured that they knew what happened to Rachel. It didn't seem as though she noticed the staring. She was too busy telling him about her first dance class and how the teacher was a real bitch.

After lunch, Rachel wanted to take him to see her dorm room. She hadn't been there in weeks so she was worried about what her roommate had done to the place. He had always wondered what it'd be like to have a college girl invite him to her room and he made sure to tell Rachel about it in the elevator. She just shoved him playfully and laughed about it. When they got into her room, it was, well, interesting.

Her roommate, Kate, had put a curtain up beside Rachel's bed and desk so that no one could really notice Rachel's side of the room. Kate's side was as cluttered as all get out. There were clothes scattered everywhere. There were empty Ramen containers on her desk and on the floor. And there was this smell. Neither of them could really tell what it was. The expression on Rachel's face was a mix of disgust and horror. Thankfully, nothing on Rachel's side had been touched, but it would take weeks to get that smell out of her comforter and pillows.

Rachel went crazy. She ripped down the curtain and started cleaning everything. Finn had seen crazy Rachel before, but this was a new level of crazy. He instantly felt bad for Kate and what she would have to deal with the next time Rachel saw her.

After two hours of cleaning and no sign of Kate, Rachel wanted to leave. Finn suggested that they go back to the hotel and watch a movie or something. He figured that would bring back the less crazy version of Rachel that he knew and loved.

**-X-**

After a back-to-back Barbra movie marathon, Finn woke up to find Rachel asleep on his arm. He quietly moved his arm out from under her and went to turn the TV off. Before he reached the TV, Rachel's phone went off. He tried to reach it before the sound of _Faithfully_ woke her up. He answered it with a whisper as he walked into the bathroom and shut the door. "Hello?"

"Hi. Is this Finn Hudson?" The other voice answered.

"Uh… yeah. Who's this?"

"It's Detective Reed."

"Oh. Okay."

"Listen, , we've had a major break through in the case."

"Really?" Finn said just a bit louder.

"Yes. We have arrested whom we believe is the attacker. He matches the description. We are waiting for DNA to tell us whether it's him or not."

"That's great. Right?"

"Yes. It is. The only problem is that when we tried to arrest him, he ran. We had to fire shots at him." Finn was trying to understand what the detective was getting at. "We had to shoot him down. By the time, we got him to the hospital, he lost a lot of blood. The doctors do not expect him to make it through the night."

"What does this have to do with Rachel?"

"We are going to need her to come in and wrap up her statement. As long as the DNA test comes back for a positive match, then this case is over."

"So, he's going to die, right?" Finn asked.

"It seems that way, ."

"Okay." Finn gathered his thoughts. "When do you want to see Rachel?"

"Sometime later today would be great. I'm sure that both of you are ready for this to be over."

"Yes, sir. We'll be there soon." Finn hung up. He went to open the door and there she was.

Rachel was standing at the door with a thoughtful look on her face.

"Did you hear all of that?"

She nodded. "It's him?"

"They are pretty sure it is."

She took a breath. "And he's going to die?"

"Yeah. He ran when the police tried to arrest him. They had to shoot at him."

She just stood there taking in the information. "What now?"

"They want to meet with you one last time to wrap things up."

"When?"

"Now?"

She looked up at him for the first time during this conversation. "Okay."

She gathered her things and then took his hand as they departed for the police station one last time.


	12. Keep Breathing

**A/N: Here's a short chapter (at least in my mind). It was just a random idea I thought of and I want to know how you like it. Also, side note, I do not write smut. Or at least I don't think I do. Please R&R! Lots of LOVE! **

"Alright, all that you need to do know is sign a few papers and you will be free to go." Detective Reed said.

"So, you're sure that it was him?" Finn asked just to clarify.

"Yes, the DNA test came back positive for both Rachel's and another girl's sample. It was him. We got him." He looked Rachel in the eye to reassure her of this.

She was a bit in shock of the situation. She hadn't expected them to get him let alone kill him. Sure she had hoped that he'd die a painful death since the moment that he forced her onto the ground, but she just couldn't believe it.

Finn grabbed her hand and they made their way to the front desk to sign the papers. He watched as she signed her name. Her hand was shaking the whole time. He was officially worried about her. Again.

She was silent the whole way back to the hotel. When they got back to the room, she informed him that she wanted to take a shower.

She went into the bathroom and turned on the shower. She quickly stripped and got in. She kept turning the heat up. It just wasn't hot enough. She couldn't feel the heat. She started to scrub herself with the washcloth. She felt dirty. She needed to get clean.

Then came the sobbing. She started to cry and couldn't stop it. It just kept coming. She dropped the washcloth. Her body started shaking uncontrollably from the sobbing. That's when it happened. She slipped on the washcloth.

Finn had laid down on the bed and turned the TV on. He had just started to dose off when he heard it. A familiar screech coming from the bathroom. Again, his military training kicked in and he raced to the bathroom. He almost kicked down the door, but went for the doorknob instead.

"Rachel?!" He asked as he pulled the shower curtain back. Tears came to his eyes from the sight. There she was curled up in a ball, sobbing on the bathtub floor. Her skin was red. The steam was suffocating him so he shut the shower off and leaned down to try and calm her down. "Rachel, baby?"

No answer. Just crying.

He bent down and touched her arm. She immediately reacted and wrapped her arms around his neck, still sobbing.

"Rach?" He asked confused.

No answer. Just more crying and a tight grip.

He tried to get up and get her a towel, but she wouldn't let go. He decided to lift her out of the tub. She didn't protest.

He carried her over to the sink and tried to sit her down so he could get her a towel, but she sobbed harder.

_Screw it!_ He thought. He tightened his grip on her and left the bathroom. He sat down on the bed as he held her naked body. He tried rocking her to calm her down as though she were a child.

After a good ten minutes of sobbing, Rachel started to calm down. Her skin was a light pink and her head had detached itself from his neck. He rubbed small circles on her back like he used to when she was upset.

He decided to try the talking thing again. "Rach, baby, what's wrong? What happened?"

She took a breath. "I-I don't know. I just, I couldn't stop it." She finally looked up at him with her big brown eyes.

"Why was the water so hot?"

"I was trying to get clean."

"You weren't that dirty when you went in there." He asked confused.

"It wasn't that." She answered. "I felt like I did after it happened."

"Oh." Finn said as he came into realization about what she was talking about. "Why did you feel like that?"

"I don't know." She rested her head against his shoulder trying to relax her heart rate. She could feel it in her ears.

"Do you think it might have to do with everything that happened today?" Finn suggested.

"I know it does." She said. "I'm sorry."

Finn lifted her chin so that she was looking into his eyes. "Hey. You don't ever have to apologize for that. Okay?" She nodded.

He sighed. He noticed that her body had quit shaking so much. He wiped away the tears that still lingered on her face. Even with her looking like a hot mess, he thought she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.

He bent down and kissed her. Rachel gladly greeted his kiss. She shifted so that they had a better angle. It was then she remembered how naked she was. And how wet she was making Finn. She leaned back from the kiss and started to get up.

He pulled her back down. "Where do you think you're going?"

"Finn, we need to dry off. I'm wet and I'm getting you wet." She explained as she tried to get up again.

He gently pulled her back down and kissed her again. "Exactly." He said with a smirk. He then remembered what she had just gone through. "Oh my god, Rach. I'm sorry I forgot about what happened there for a sec."

Rachel just smiled and went in for another kiss. "It's fine." She said before straddling his lap. "In fact, it's perfect."

Finn wasn't sure what to do. His totally amazing and absolutely hot girlfriend was straddling his lap and starting to grind him. He thought that maybe he should say something to let her know that she didn't have to do this if she didn't want to. All he could think to say was, "I love you. You know that right?"

She sat up from her position where she had been nibbling at his neck. "Of course. I love you, too."

"I just want you to know that."

"Finn I do." She said as she kissed his cheek.

"Are you sure you're ready?" He asked as he kissed her nose.

She nodded and said, "Remind me what making love feels like."

He made sure to do that.


	13. I Won't Give Up

**A/N: Hi all. I know it's been forever since I've updated and to tell you the truth, the only reason I did was because people have been randomly following the story which told me that people are still reading it. This is the second to last chapter. I hope to have the epilogue up within a week but no promises. As always, please R&R. Lots of Love. **

The remainder of the week flew by in a blur. It was full of sight-seeing, shopping, singing, and everything else New York had to offer. Before they knew it, it was their last night together before Finn had to fly out again. He was to fly to Georgia to rejoin his platoon and deploy to Iraq.

Rachel had spent their time together trying to forget about what was coming next. He would leave. She would have to be on her own again in New York. She wasn't sure if she would be okay with that.

She thought of these things as she sat at her desk in her dorm room watching him sitting on her bed using her laptop.

"What about this one?" He said turning the device so that she could see it. "She specializes in rape victims and she's only 20 minutes from here if you take a cab."

She hated that word. _Victim_. But she guessed that was what she was now. She glanced over the review of the therapist. She had a nice face and her patients seemed very impressed with her. "She might be okay."

"C'mon, Rach. We gotta pick one." Finn said turning the laptop back to him so he could keep searching.

"Why do I have to go anyway?"

"Because, I'm not going to be here and you need someone to talk to. Someone who knows what they're doing." He said as he typed.

"But you said we would talk online and stuff."

"Yes, but I'm not going to be here. You need someone here who you can talk to in person. You've had to go see a therapist many times before. You said that you enjoyed having someone to talk to."

"True, but I talked to them about boys and my career and my two gay dads. I didn't have to tell them about anything like this."

"That's why I'm trying to find you someone who has experience with this stuff."

Rachel had been putting the idea of a therapist down ever since Finn mentioned it a couple of nights ago. And she wasn't about to give up her stance on the topic.

She got up from her desk chair and made her way over to the twin-sized dorm bed. She climbed over to her boyfriend as he moved the laptop over welcoming her onto his lap. Rachel settled herself on his lap as he brought the computer back down onto her lap and continued looking at the search results.

"Are they're really that many therapist in New York City?" She asked.

"Apparently." He answered clicking on another link.

"I guess that means that there truly are a lot of crazy people here."

He stopped what he was doing for a moment and took a breath. "Just because you see a therapist does not mean that you're crazy."

"I guess not." She said as he resumed his work. "Thanks."

"For what?"

"For this. For helping me through all of this." Her eyes started gathering tears. "Even after I tried to turn you away, you wouldn't give up."

Finn grabbed the laptop and set down on her bedside table. He lifted her face so that they were eye to eye. "I'll never give up on you." He kissed her gently and she turned her body to face him. "I just want to make sure that you're going to be okay after I leave. I need to make sure of that." He said looking her sternly in the eyes, wiping away a tear that had escaped.

She smiled. "I know." He smiled back. "I guess a therapist won't be that bad." She caved. "Just please not the one that had the mole on their nose."

He laughed as the mood of the conversation changed. "Deal."

**-X-**

They left her dorm room and boarded a bus that would take them back to their hotel. Finn watched as Rachel looked out the window. Every once in a while, she would point out an interesting statue or landmark and tell him everything that she knew about it.

"Sounds like your falling in love with the city again." He said after she point out the Statue of Liberty way off in the distance.

She turned and smiled at him. "I think I am."

After a couple more blocks, Finn thought of something he had been meaning to ask her. "Hey, Rach?"

"What?" She said leaning into his side.

"There's something I've been wanting to ask you ever since Kurt first told me about what happened."

Her smile vanished at the mention of the attack, but she looked up anticipating the question.

He continued, "Kurt said that the only person you really talked to when you got home was Quinn. Why was that?"

She took a deep shaky breath as she thought of what to say. "Well, there were a couple of reasons. I figured that she wouldn't look or treat me too differently just because of what had happened. Plus, I kind of went through a phase where I really just didn't want to talk to any guys. Then…" She stopped.

"Then, what?" He asked wanting to know. "Rach?"

"Right after I got home, I felt really sick all the time. I got worried that I might be pregnant."

Finn hadn't even thought of that possibility.

"When Kurt told me Quinn was coming home and wanted to see me, I had the idea that I should confide in her. I figured she was the least likely person to judge me no matter what happened. Anyways, I called her up after Kurt left and talked with her about everything and then she offered to pick up a test before she came to see me. I took her up on that right away. So, the next day she came over and I took the test and it said I was not pregnant." Finn let out a breath he didn't know he had been holding. "I was so relieved that I forgot about everything else for a while and just caught up with my friend. We talk about the attack anymore. She didn't ask me any questions about it and I was glad. She was the only one who didn't ask me about it. We just talked as if it were any other day. And that's what happened."

"Okay." Finn said giving her a one-armed hug. "I was just curious because I mean it is Quinn Fabray."

"Yeah. If there ever were anyone who needed to see a shrink, it would be her." Rachel said with a soft laugh.

"Are you calling her crazy?"

"Yes, I am."

They both smiled knowing that it was very true.

**-X-**

The next day, the couple made their way to JFK airport to say good-bye.

Rachel started tearing up the moment she woke up that morning. She knew once Finn left, she would be on her own. No more boyfriend there to hold her when she cried. No more shoulder to lean on when she was down. No more Finn to tell her exactly what she needed to hear. Well, maybe that last one wasn't true. But, it sure felt true.

Finn had set Rachel up with a therapist the night before. He had also got NYADA to change the locks on her dorm room door and add a second lock on the window just to ensure that she felt as safe as could be.

He looked down at Rachel as they walked up to security. The place where they would have to part. Rachel was different now. He could see it in her eyes. He could see it in the way she walked. He knew why she was different. There was no question about that. She was no longer this insecure little teenage drama queen (although he had loved her that way). It seemed that she had grown up so much over the past few weeks. Not that she wanted to. She was forced to (a thought that made his blood boil). Now, she was more serious. She thought more about important things rather than things like skin care and animal sweaters.

It seemed like Rachel had gone from a girl to a woman in a split second. And he loved her even more because of it. Sure he hated that it happened, but it showed him just how strong his girl could be. He was proud of her.

They stopped right before they reached the line for security. Rachel looked up at Finn, not with tear-filled eyes, but with a smile.

"I guess this is where we part." She said handing him his backpack that she insisted on carrying even though it weighed around 20 lbs.

"Yeah." He said. "But, Rach, this isn't forever. I'll see you real soon. In the mean time, we can Skype and I'll try to call if I can't do that."

"I know. That's why I'm not too scared of you going. I know that I'll see you again."

He leaned down and kissed her. "You bet you will."

"That being said, you better not go out and get yourself killed." She said in a serious tone.

"I know. I won't. And you know why?" He looked her in the eyes. "Because, I know that we are meant to be together. I know that we are meant to grow old together. I am meant to be there with you through everything you do and achieve. That's why I'm going to do this."

Finn placed his luggage on the ground and got down on one knee. He reached in his pocket and pulled out a familiar looking ring. "I'm going to ask you again. Rachel Berry, will you marry me?"

Rachel looked stunned for a moment. Her pause cause his heart to stop. It wasn't until she leaned down and kissed him that his blood started pumping again.

"Yes." She whispered against his lips. "A thousand times yes."


End file.
